Wednesday, September 3, 2014

"Where there is life, there is hope."

“However bad life my seem, there is always something you can do, and succeed at. Where there is life, there is hope.” – Stephen Hawking


 A few weeks ago, social media was flooded with posts about Robin Williams’ passing, which once again brought the subject of mental illness and depression into the public forum. More than anything, it seemed that people were shocked that a man who had achieved what appeared to be the very definition of “success” could possibly have wanted to take his own life. I think – if anything – this sentiment represents one of the most common misconceptions about mental illness: successful people are somehow immune, that mental illness and success are mutually-exclusive.

I have worked with severely depressed individuals in my own practice, which has deepened my understanding about what a diagnosis of depression actually means. It's been an education for me, and I feel privileged to provide some comfort to those that are suffering. Here are a few of the things I've observed, first-hand. 

First of all, depression a spectrum; not everyone suffers the same way, or to the same degree. I myself struggled with relatively mild depression on and off since childhood, but was finally able to control it with self-care, herbal medicine, and acupuncture. Others I know require more drastic means of intervention.

Second, depression is not the same as being sad. I think our collective image of a depressed person is someone who walks around looking mopey, like Eeyore from Whinnie the Pooh, casting doom and gloom wherever they go. In my own experience, people who are the most depressed are the best at hiding it – sometimes because they don’t want to burden others around them, but also because they feel that sharing is pointless because their depression is not an issue that can be fixed. I find that this is especially true for men, who are socialized to “grin and bear it” through everything or risk being seen as "weak."

Sometimes there is no “why.” As human beings, we like to place ourselves at the center of our own universe. When someone takes their own life, the people around them often want to know what they could have done, they want to know “why?” and “how could they?” The bottom line is that depression is a disease. Just like having a good job or a perfect marriage can’t cure cancer, these things can’t always “cure” clinical depression. When I was at the height of my own depression, I would try to reason with myself and say things like, “I have such a perfect life! Why do I still feel like this?” The fact that my mood responded immediately to herbs, supplements, and dietary changes made me realize that depression was just as much a product of my body as it was in my head. I’m not saying that our circumstances don’t have a role to play in how we feel – simply that it’s often more complex than circumstances alone.

All depression is treatable. This summer, I lost two people from within my circle to suicide - one of them very recently. Although I admit I didn’t know either of them well, these losses resonated with me because we were the same age, had many of the same friends and interests, and our lives were comparable in many other ways. If I could have said anything to either of them, it would have been the quote from the beginning of this post. “Where there is life, there is hope.” I believe with every fiber of my being that even the worst depression is beatable, through a combination of counseling, lifestyle changes, dietary therapy, alternative therapies like acupuncture (but of course not limited to acupuncture alone), and – in many cases – medication. Getting help for the depression is often the scariest part, because it forces us to admit that our lives have gotten to a point where we are no longer in control. It must be hard to believe that change is possible, or to summon the energy to try. Depression is a day-by-day thing that must be conquered, day by day. However, it's a journey that starts with a single step, and that step usually involves reaching out and getting help.

I should mention that I've been struggling to write this entry for over a week now. I hope it didn't come across as trite or obvious. Also, one of my favorite writings on depression actually comes from a humor blog, Hyperbole and a Half. It's so full of insight, wrapped in wacky and unique humor.

Finally, if you know someone (or are someone) who is coping with depression, I highly recommend the book "The Chemistry of Joy," by Henry Emmons. It has become the cornerstone of my approach for helping advise others regarding their own depression, and it's full of great tactics for those wanting to try an integrative approach to taking control of their mental wellness.